Random thoughts

Besides the odd photo, I haven't been able to give you a true update on life lately. It's just been plain busy. You're not going to get one now, either. Sorry for the tease.

Instead, here are some random thoughts to tide over the hungry masses. I will get around to a full scale posting eventually, so stay tuned...

1. Cold weather makes Chinese people barf. In the past two weeks, I have seen 3 people puking on the street (one was actually in a bush, but still it was outside). This phenomena started as soon as the weather got cold. I asked some friends about this and they too have noticed the unusually high number of people spewing chunks.

Here are the theories: People are drinking more to stay warm and thus hurling. The cold weather is genetically incompatible with the Chinese digestive system. There has been no rain to wash away chunks on the sidewalk making it seem as if there is more vomit.

You decide.

2. For a country that doesn't believe in or know very much about Christianity, there sure are a lot of Christmas decorations. I was quite shocked actually when the malls started to put up lights, ornaments and even life-sized Santas. In fact, I can even buy a Christmas tree at the Wu-Mart! Who knew?

After consulting with co-workers, I discovered people here love the holidays. They don't understand the whole religious part of it but in terms of consumerism- this is the IT time.

Presents won't be handed out here on Christmas day. Instead, the Chinese celebrate what's called Spring Festival. It is when everyone goes home to visit their families. Presents and money are exchanged then. Businesses shut down, transportation infrastructure gets overloaded. Very much the same as in America expect Spring Festival is the third week in January. Don't ask me why it is called the "Spring" festival.

3. I have inspired a fashion trend at my office. ME. HA this makes me laugh. One day I came in wearing a hat. I wore it because I didn't shower before work and looked like a grease ball.

Everyone kept telling me how cute it was. In fact, if I don't wear the hat at least once a weak, people ask me where it is.

Today, it went to a whole new level. There were 2 girls in the office wearing similar hats. I pointed to theirs and gave the thumbs up, which sent them in to giggles. Only in China could I be considered fashion forward!

4. One thing you can't accuse me of being, no matter where in the world I am, is classy. I was with a friend having lunch. Afterwards, we were walking around when I blurt out, "You can never just fart in China because you don't know if there will be more with it." She gave me a look which said, "you should probably just think those thoughts not actually say them."

However, she did agree with me that it was a true statement...

5. Computer keyboards are in English. I don't know how they do it, but you punch in a series of English letters and on the screen words pop up in Chinese characters. Very impressive.

6. The couple who lives above me are like walking alarm clocks. At 3 a.m. every morning, the old man gets up and takes a piss. The ferocity of the pee hitting the water, tells me it is a man doing this. His shuffle back to bed, tells me his age.

7. The heat is now on in my apartment. The government sets a day to turn on the heat in Beijing. I am not sure if there is one switch and a ceremony or if every building owner gets the go ahead to jack the thermostat.

From what I've been told, the date is always the same, no matter how cold or hot it is.

8. Sign language is universal. At least my made up version is. By using hand signals, I have successfully gotten a restaurant to give me take-out food, chosen a drink from the cafeteria and even navigated a taxi driver. All those years of Comedy Sports are finally paying off.